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Saturday, July 9, 2011

Los Mocosos Give me HOPE for our Future!

You remember that scene in "Coming to America" where Eddie Murphy's character, Randy Watson, starts singing "Greatest Love of All" by Whitney Houston?  One of the best comedic moments in cinema ever!  Serio!  You disagree with me?  I'll stab you then.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nHRERLEM2eE

I had an incident today where two kids came up to me and were so polite, it put adults to CHAME! That's not a typo.  Latinos don't understand the "sh" sound in Ingles.  Can you imagine saying "Pansho Villa"?  CMC!  (George Lopez for 'LOL').

Anyways....

My job requires me to be muy (very) versatile.  Be on time.  Have strong organizational and communication skills.  Have strong attention to detail.  The latter is the most important. One day,  I had to pull a serious Mr. Hankey out of the toilet so the customers can come back and return the favor.  Chingada!

On this particular day, my Jefe (boss) scheduled me in the part of the job that I HATE the most: Giving out free food and coffee to the many mugrosos (nasty people) of Los Angeles.  You give people free samples and they critique and complain about how dry, nasty, or slow you are moving to give them their coffee, etc, etc.  It makes me pretty damn murderous.  Serio!

As usual, I was behind the eight ball.  I had people hovering over the plexi glass shield (like that helps) staring at me, waiting for the next batch of quesadillas.

I tend to stare down at my knife while preparing the samples, to avoid making eye contact with the people.

I failed to notice two little girls, sisters, that had returned for a second visit.  They looked up at me as I was slicing away.  I looked at them.  They smiled.

"Hi.  I'm sorry, but the next batch won't be ready for a minute.  I just pulled them out of the oven, and they're hot", said I.  "That's okay.  Thank you very much.  Can you Please give us some without the guacamole.  It's too spicy."

WTF?  Did these two kids just say "Thank You" and "Please" and "That's Okay".  Que? Que?  As I looked up, there were all these grown ups looking at me, waiting for their bite of freebie quesadilla.

I replied, "Sure.  Just give me a minute."  The older sister replies, "That's okay.  Thank you."

QUE?  I had to look up again?  I almost fainted!

See:  Most kids in this town are snotty, mocosos (BRATS).  Parents these days hide behind them with their stupid ass, disrespectful behavior.

Kid behaves bad.  Parent defends kid.  Parent is a shit.

I'm an evil shit for daring to look at a kid or telling them not to run into my workspace, because there are hot, dangerous items that could burn them.  BTW, it's usually white people that defend their kids for doing something wrong.

If I did what some of these kids are doing....Sheeeeeiiiiiiitttt!  You ever had a CHANCLA?  Back in the day, women would wear wooden flip flops.  That shit hurt ese!

Any wrong doing or smart ass comment to another grown up.....WHACK!  Even the stare of my Mom would make me think otherwise.

I'd give a Mom a Benny if she dared do that in public these days.  Fo Real!

I paused for a minute to look at these girls.  "Thank you for being patient and polite", I said.

"No problem."  Ya me cague at this point.  Yeah.  I let one go, but not poop.  TMI.  I know.  Whatevs...

People are always in such a hurry.  Me! Me! Me! Me! Me! Me! Me fuckin' Me!  And we're a Christian Nation?

According to La Biblia; Jesus said "I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the Kingdom of God like a little child will not enter it."

"I have no idea what this means,"  is what you are probably thinking.  A bunch of kids wanted to meet Jesus.  People wanted to keep them away.  He said, "Chill.  They're not judgmental.  Be like them."

Yup.  Be like them.  But with the manners that these two girls displayed.

I thanked them out loud.  A few people skirted away.  One, homeless-ish, guy said to me "Thank you for acknowledging the good behavior of children."  He had a beard too.  Jesus?

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